81: How To Own Your Money Authority

If you ever feel like money is out of your control and you find yourself saying things like ‘money just slips through my fingers’ or ‘I can’t afford it’, this episode is for you.

In this episode you will learn:

  • Why the way you talk about money matters
  • What to avoid saying about money
  • How to take responsibility for the money you DO HAVE in your life
  • Why acknowledging the money you do have is so important
  • How to own your money authority

You can listen to the episode above or read the unedited transcript below.

Transcript

Meaghan Smith  00:20

Hello beautiful people and welcome to another episode of the Money Mindful Podcast. I am your host, Meaghan Jean Smith. I am a money mindset and life coach for women. Okay, I have to tell you about something before we get into the main topic of today how to own your money or authority before we chat about that. I just finished reading a Tony Robbins book. Yeah, Tony Robbins. I've never read any of his stuff before. And I've seen a couple of video like I've seen, like a short video of his or, or something like that on the internet. And he seems quiet, rah, rah. manly to me, which isn't my thing, right? I'm not saying that. I think he's not great or anything like that. But it's just, I'm more into learning from women. I love it. I love learning from the women. Anyway, I saw his book at the library selling the master the game of money. I think it was called sorry, Tony, if I got that wrong. I'll put a link in the show notes just anyway. And I'll make sure I get it right in the show notes. And, look, I think he could have made the book half the size. Because the first half of the book for me. I was like, yeah, yeah, yeah, I know all this stuff already. It's exactly what I tell other people not to do. Whenever I'm running workshops. I always say, listen, show up with a beginner's mindset show up like you've never learned this stuff before. Because then you get so much more out of it. And you prime your brain for learning. Well, I think I need to listen to my own advice. Anywho. If you want to learn about sales, I've got to say read that book. Not that he talks about sales at all, but he is a master at generating excitement, and desire and intrigue and you know, wanting to find out more. He is really good about that. Because I kept thinking, Okay, well, I've got to read the neck next chapter, because I need to learn about XYZ that he's just primed me to find out about. Anyway, this is not meant to be a review of the book. But in actual fact, I actually after finishing reading it, the second half of the book, I thought was way better than the first half. There's a lot of amazing information in that book about money. And if you're into investing in shares you I'm sure you will agree. There's a lot of people who are the top of the top investors in the world that share information in that book, he interviews them. But one of the things that I got out of reading that book was this really cool little video that's been made by Ray Dalio. He's the founder of Bridgewater associates. He's like one of those bigwig, hedge fund guys. But he has made a video it's on. It's on the internet. And again, I'll put the link in the show notes. And it's called how the economic machine works. And if you are interested in money and money mindset, which I'm assuming you are, because you're listening to this podcast, and if you're not, what is happening is that you mom, now anyway, I'll stop jerking around. Do yourself a favour, go and watch this video. I love it. It is so simple. And it really explains how the economy actually works. And especially oh my gosh, for all those naysayers. Like, I don't know how many conversations I've had with people about property investing and what drives the price up of property and

Meaghan Smith  04:20

like a lot of people who don't actually invest in property have a lot to say about property and what happens with property and why things do certain things. It's the same with in share investments. I don't know how many times people who don't actually own shares, have advised me on share investing, like mate if you're not doing it yourself. Sorry. Give me advice, please. There's that amazing saying that Brene Brown says I can't remember what it is but something about if you're not actually in the arena, with me doing the things that I'm doing like don't try And tell me how to do it. I'm totally not interested. Anyway, that's completely not the quote. But it's something like that. But I digress. Listen, it's economic principles.org I will put a link in the show notes. It's a animated video on how the economic economic machine works. I highly recommend you go and watch it. It is such a simple video for understanding why house prices go up? Why we have inflation, why we have deflation, why interest rates go down, why interest rates go up, it explains how the economy works. And I think it demystifies a lot of reasons why things happen the way that they do, like why interest rates go down, why interest rates go up? So go and check that out. All right, now, let me get into what I want to talk about. You know what I think I just recently talked about how I hate it, how people bang on at the start of podcasts and don't get into the meat of it to straight away. And that's exactly what I just did, then. Yes, whenever you make a stand on something, you just eat your words, five seconds later, well, that's just me, I don't know about you. But anyway, how to own your money authority. Alright. There's quite a few things I want to talk to you about on this topic. There's four points, actually, that I want to discuss with you. And what I mean by owning your money authority is what I see in general conversation with people that I know and also people that I coach, is there's this disconnect from them and their money, as if either they don't have any control over what happens with their money. Or they just that money is not their money, even though it is their money. Okay, so I'll give you a couple of examples. So for instance, if you feel like money just slips through your fingers, and you don't know where the money goes, that's a sign that you're not owning your money authority. Okay? Also, there's situations like, one of my clients was telling me about how she had all these this savings in her account, but she didn't think of it as her money. She just thought of it as her partner's money. Right. And it had never, she'd never even thought about it, she'd never examined it, but she just always sort of just discounted that money. Like it somehow wasn't money for her that she couldn't use that money, even though it was her money in a bank account with her name on it. Because her husband had made that money and majority of that money had come from his income going into their joint account, she just didn't consider it her money. Alright, that's another sign of not owning your money authority. Okay, so let's talk about this a little bit. And I want to give you some examples just to create awareness. Okay, this is all about creating awareness about how you are thinking about money, but also so you can decide for yourself how you want to show up with money. And you can you can decide for yourself, whether you think that you're not owning your money authority, and whether you want to do something about it or not, whether you're okay with that, or whether you want to change, and I'll give you some ideas about that as well. The first example is, so if you feel like money slipping through your fingers, and you don't know where it goes, one of the ways that you can own your money or authority, like Own your authority as the spender of the money, so the money doesn't have a mind of its own the money doesn't just disappear. You're actually spending it. I know, right?

Meaghan Smith  09:21

What really, I did that. So one thing that you can do is get an app or just a simple notepad and pen will do and actually just record what you're spending your money on. And that is such a simple thing. I know it sounds so simple, but it can be so powerful for you to just really see where your money is going. And you don't have to do it forever. I'm not suggesting that you have to record every single dollar that you spend. But if you if you have trouble with running out of If money and you're really not sure where the money goes, like you have instances where I think I told you recently about how we kept getting money on our credit card, I was like, What is happening? Why do we keep owing money on a credit card is, and it was just simply because we hadn't examined what was happening for a while, and we had more expenses. And but just that simple act of being aware, immediately puts you in a place where you can decide to have authority over what you're spending on or not. I'm going to use a total cliche example. Don't cringe, but it's just the first one that's come to my mind. It's that typical thing of when, you know, suddenly you realise, Oh, my gosh, I'm spending $100 on coffees a week. Now, once you see that, if you decide that you want to continue spending $100 on coffees a week, and you're totally fine with that, that's fine. That is owning your money authority. But if you don't even realise you're spending $100 a week on coffee, and what you thought you were spending was actually just a couple of bucks here and there on coffee, that's not owning your money authority. Right? Can you see the difference there? So it's not about what you spend your money on, you're allowed to spend your money on whatever you want, it's your money. The distinction here is, are you owning it, though? Are you owning it, that you are the spender of your money, you are the one that is choosing what you spend your money on. And it really is up to you. But if you don't have the money at the end of the month to pay your bills, because you just bought yourself a brand new pair of I don't know, whatever, something something amazing and expensive. That's up to you, if you're happy to let your bills go overdue, because you want to buy something, sell something else, that's fine. Are you owning that? But when you own it, maybe you are thinking Actually no, I don't want to buy that thing. I want to be able to pay for my bills, I want to have electricity. Okay? That is owning your money authority. Okay, so, so powerful to just really identify and see what you are spending your money on.

Meaghan Smith  12:32

Okay, here's the next tip for owning your money authority. Avoid saying I can't afford it. Rather, say I'm choosing to spend my money on X, whatever it is, because so many things we say we can't afford, which in actual fact, it's not true. You're just choosing to spend your money on something else. There's lots of things that you want that you totally can afford. If I just go back to that last example, you totally can afford to buy that amazing $300 pair of bathers. But you're choosing to spend that $300 on your electricity bill, because that is where you are deciding on purpose. Because you are the you own your money authority. That is what you're choosing to spend your money on. Do you see the difference there? You totally can afford that. That pair of bathers. But you're choosing to spend your money on your electricity bill. Got it. Okay. It's so easy to say we can't afford it. And so many people say it, including myself, we just say it before we think about it. But really, that's a disempowering thought. And it doesn't put you in the ownership of your money. It's not you're not owning your money or authority when you say I can't afford it. Now, maybe there are some things that you can't afford that really are like beyond the amount of money that you have, or you're not able to borrow money or whatever, you really can't afford it. But most of the things that you say you can't afford, I'm willing to bet you probably can. It's just you're actually choosing to spend your money on something else.

Meaghan Smith  14:32

Okay, the next tip is take responsibility for the money you do have in your life. Okay, now that's going back to that example before when I was saying this client of mine, she actually had all this money, like a significant amount of savings, but she just had totally not taken ownership of that money. The that it was hers. Isn't that amazing? And, and so many people do that like more than you would know. It's really surprised me a lot like a lot of people I work with. Talk to me about this. And I went through a little bit of this as well, when I first had children, and my partner was working. And he was the main breadwinner, and I went on maternity leave, and we had to make some adjustments there. And I did have some thoughts about the money for a little while, but it about it not being mine, I don't anymore. But there was a stage where there was a little bit of our own. Yeah, is that my money. And really, it's, it's up to you, but and this is my own personal opinion, opinion. But if you're in a partnership with somebody, like if you're a family unit, and you make decisions, as a partnership, that one of you is going to earn money, and one of you is going to and contribute to the family in other ways, like looking after the children, for instance, that money is totally your money. So many people, though don't own it as their money. And they defer to their partner as if it's their money, or that they can't use that money. And funnily enough, in this situation of this client that I had, when when she became aware of this, and because there was something that she did want to spend the money on, and when she went and talked to her partner about it partner was totally on board. He was like, yeah, of course, was you should use the money, like she had just made all these assumptions herself. You know, it's based on the patriarchy, we never even question it. But by not questioning it, it's at our own expense. So if you are in a situation where you're in a partnership with somebody, I mean, maybe you're in a partnership, where you're not in a family unit, or you don't live together or, you know, I'm I'm not going to begin to suggest that I know what's best for you or your relationship or your situation. All I want to point out to you is that if you are in a situation where you're not the one who brings the income in and another person does do, what do you think of that money? Do you take ownership of it? Do you think of it as not yours? So I'm just putting that out there? Right? Do you take ownership of the money that you actually have access to because a lot of people have access to money that they just don't own? They don't own it, that it's theirs.

Meaghan Smith  17:38

Okay. And the next and final point that I want to make is acknowledge the money that you do create? Have you ever said or ever done something like, Oh, yeah, but it was only a few $100. I like so many clients I've talked to and I've done this myself, so I'm totally guilty of doing this myself is discounting the money that I've made? like making it out like either? Oh, yes, but it wasn't that much money. So sort of like discrediting the money, or worse, even worse, Oh, my gosh, brushing it off, and just saying, Oh, yeah, I was just lucky, I was just lucky that I got that money, or, you know, created that money in my business, it was just luck. No, it was not luck. And when you talk like that, like language matters, language is powerful. That is not owning your money authority. Like if you're in business, if you are a business person, it is not luck. If you make money, right? You make money because of a process that you do. And if you're not sure what that process is, you better work that out. Because that is what is creating the money in your life. It's not luck. And if you say that it is luck, it's you're not owning your money, authority, right. And also, when you earn money, every single dollar you make, you made it you own that I own your money, authority. And why what is even the point of that, because when we don't own our money authority, it's out of our control. It's disempowering. We don't then know how to create more. But when you take responsibility for the money that you have in your life, when you have full ownership of your money, authority, your authority as the creator of the money that comes into your life and your authority of the spender. So there's two, two ways right there. So it's the way that you, it's you as the creator of money, the money that you create, whether that be through a business, where you create value in your business, and people give you money as an exchange for that value. Whether you create value working in a company, where the employer pays you money for the value that you bring, as an employee in that company, right? Own your money authority, because from that place, you are able to create more. And you're also able to spend less, if that's something that you want to do, okay? Because you can't spend less if you're not owning your authority as a spender, because it's just money just disappears because you're not taking responsibility for it.

Meaghan Smith  20:36

Alright, that has that is all I have got for you today. If you want to work with me, and you want to take this work deeper, go to the money mindful website and book a consultation with me. What's a consultation? consultation is a one hour chat on zoom, we do it online. So if you're overseas, if you're not in Australia, that's fine. I have clients who are overseas, we talk on zoom for an hour, you get to tell me exactly where you are in your life right now you get to tell me about the struggles that you're having. Then we talk about I take you through a process where you tell me about where you want to be what you want to create in your life. And then I bridge that gap for you. So we we map it out. Like this is like the really cool part we map out how you can actually get from where you are now to where you want to be. That is what the consult is. And then if we're a really good fit two peas in a pod. Then we talk about whether we're going to work together or not. Okay, so until I see you next week, have an amazing week. Bye Bye.

Episode references

How The Economic Machine Works by Ray Dalio

Tony Robbins: MONEY, Master the Game

Book a consultation with me here.

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