Carlie Maree author of USA Today bestselling book - Soul Modes is my guest on the show. Her book Soul Modes is based on the idea that "You are not one ordinary woman. You're four extraordinary ones." Tune in to learn about your four soul modes and how you can tap into the power of them to find your flow around wealth and money.
In this episode you will learn:
- What the four soul modes are
- The sequence that all women cycle through - Wild Mode, Sparkle Mode, Bear Mode and Super Mode
- How knowing your soul modes can help you work with yourself rather than against yourself
- How being in tune with your soul modes can equip you to get to know yourself and let your life flow
- How women can tap into the power of their soul modes to find their flow around wealth and money
You can listen to the episode above or read the unedited transcript below.
How To Tap Into The Power Of Your Soul Modes To Find Your Flow Around Wealth & Money with Carlie Maree
Meaghan Smith 00:21
Hello beautiful people and welcome to another episode of the Money Mindful Podcast. I am your host, Meaghan Jean Smith. I'm a money mindset and life coach for women. I help women entrepreneurs and aspiring entrepreneurs to change their money mindset so they can create the money and life that they want. Alright, I'm super excited for you to meet my guest today, another author, you know I love the authors, I've got Carlie Maree on today who is joining me to talk all about her book. And I don't know what to call this actually, like a concept, not a concept, modes. So basically, listen, I'm going to let Carlie explain all this because I know I'm going to jumble it up. But let me tell you who she is. So she's a mother, a motivational intelligence and female leadership expert. She's a businesswoman, and author of The Wall Street Journal and USA Today bestseller book, Soul Modes. So Soul Modes is based on the research behind the idea that you are not one ordinary woman, but four extraordinary ones. And wait for it guys, because this is - I've just finished reading the book, and it's so good. So it reveals the sequence that all women cycle through. So apparently there's four modes, wild mode, sparkle mode, bear mode, and super mode, and how women can use them to seek the balance and the growth that they crave. I'm gonna stop talking about that now and get Carlie on to tell us all the things because I'm sure that she's going to be able to explain it a lot better than I can. So, Carlie, welcome. So great to have you here today.
Carlie Maree 02:11
Thank you. Thanks for having me. I love that you've read the book. It's always so fun talking to someone who's read the book. Because someone who's read the book always asks really great questions about it. So yeah, I'd love to share a little bit about what Soul Modes is, how it came about. Some people hear four modes and assume I'm talking about a menstrual cycle thing, particularly, I'm because I'm talking about women, and it's not. I know there are some people who have kind of learned about the four different phases of our menstrual cycle.
Carlie Maree 02:38
This is different to that. I stumbled across this through exploring that actually. And kind of found something that I'd noticed about myself, and then I started to notice in the women around me. When I say women, I don't necessarily mean female. Of course, there are people who don't have a womb, but identify as a woman or identify as non binary, there are people who - what I'm talking about is feminine energy. So it's that cyclical ebb and flow up and down, left and right all over the place part of the feminine that pretty much everybody has a degree of that in them. But you know, I guess most women and some men and of course, a whole bunch of non binary people are going to kind of identify as that being really strong in them.
Carlie Maree 03:22
So if you're one of those people who's like, Oh, my God, I'm all over the place. One day, I'm like cleaning out all the cupboards, and I'm on fire and I'm doing all the things. And another day, I'm don't want to do anything, I don't want to get off the couch. And another day I'm like, forgetful and can't think of anything. The other day, I feel like I'm you know, can change the world. And so what I discovered is a pattern in that kind of energetic sequence. Let's say our energy goes up, down, left and right. What we want to do goes up, down, left and right, what we're good at actually goes up, down, left and right, as well. And so I just spotted a pattern in that in myself first and then started to see it in other people. And I went wow, I think I've really uncovered something here. And so I started giving those four different parts of me nicknames.
Carlie Maree 04:05
I was in a new relationship, I'd gone through a divorce, I was in a new relationship. And I wanted, I went, I'm going to go into this this time, and I'm going to really kind of talk about what I need. I'm not just going to live in a relationship where I'm not getting what I need. I'm going to talk about what I need him to express my desires. And it's been quite remarkable, quite life changing. A lot of people have told me it's saved their relationship, it's you know, helped them to love being a mother, certainly, you know, applies in the money mindset game, certainly applies in business. And it helps us to embrace that kind of cyclical feminine magic that we all have the ability to tap into. When we're sort of living in a society that teaches us all the masculine success measures, like you know, getting it done and accountability and consistency and all that sort of stuff. And there's a place for all of that and in Super mode we'll feel really connected to all of that. And then outside of Super mode, we won't, we'll rebel against it. And then we wonder why we feel like we're going around in circles. So this kind of helps to understand the circles and to work with it rather than against it.
Meaghan Smith 05:08
So the thing that I found really fascinating when reading it, when reading the book Soul Modes, is that well, one, when you talked about the different modes, I found myself nodding and going, Yeah, yeah, I can totally see myself being in that mode. But what I really liked about it, and I'm sure we'll talk about this more today is that I felt like you really addressed working with yourself, as opposed to against yourself. So I think this might be a good time to talk about, like, what are the modes? So people listening can be like, What the f are they talking about? What are these modes?
Carlie Maree 05:52
Yeah, for sure. So it goes in this order, it always goes in this order. Wild mode, bear mode, super mode, sparkle mode. Wild mode is my favourite, but it used to not be. And I think all of them, you kind of learn how to love them, you learn how to embrace them. Most people love super, hate bear. Their partner often hates wild and loves sparkle. So I think if we can find a way to love all the parts of ourselves and bring all the best parts of ourselves out so that people around us can kind of love them and see the beauty in them as well. Okay, so let's talk them through.
Carlie Maree 06:26
Soul mode is the fiery one, she's the one who, I guess is probably the most fearless. She's the one who gets the most ragey, for me, because she cannot tolerate anything that is not in alignment with where you're going. And I'm sure for your audience, I can talk like this, right, I can talk about alignment, I can talk about moving towards what you want, paving a path towards everything you desire, clearing your crap out of the way of it, right.
Carlie Maree 06:54
So wild mode is like when - I'm not sure if your your audience has a tolerance for a little bit of spiritual talk, but I kind of like to describe that it's like your soul is leading. It's like, you know, when your soul just goes, Oh my god, I know what I need to do. It's like those moments. But when there's so much, you know, stories, in the way of Oh, I can't, and Who am I and la, la, la. In wild mode, it's like those stories get a little bit quiet and so it's when we make our most brave decisions. So it's when someone's likely to go Oh, I'm gonna start a podcast, I'm going to launch a course, I'm going to start a business I'm gonna, I'm going to call that person and ask them to collaborate with me, right? Like those kind of big moves, that suddenly, we want to make and then often we kind of make a move like that when, I'm gonna start a podcast I think, we announce it. And then suddenly we freak out. And we're like, oh, my God, what was I thinking? I'm too busy for that. I can't do that. I'm at capacity. I'm exhausted. What are people gonna think?
Carlie Maree 07:46
Because we've shifted into bear mode, because bear mode always comes after wild mode. So it's like this crash. Sometimes people call it a vulnerability hangover, right? So we go into bear mode and bear mode is when our energy shifts. It's that we're not seeking so our wild woman - it's like our inner wild woman is at the wheel. She seeks freedom. She wants to just create the life that just feels like freedom to her and it feels like everything that she desires. And what bear mode craves is stillness. And the reason why, our inner, I say hibernating bear, it's called bear mode, because it's like a hibernating bear, she craves stillness, because we need to do the kind of spiritual maintenance, that kind of energy work that allowing those challenging thoughts and feelings and beliefs to kind of bubble up to the surface so that we can feel them, so we can heal them, so we can move them through, so we can see what is kind of bubbling away under the surface there, you know, the stories from childhood we tell ourselves about we're never gonna amount to anything or, you know, it's different for everybody.
Carlie Maree 08:43
But the thing is, when we don't know that it's bear mode, we just think it's a crisis of confidence. And we think that all the things that we're thinking are true. But they're not true, they're old programming that's ready to go, because if you're going to move towards the thing that your wild woman tells you to go to, if she's like, I'm gonna start a podcast, then your bear is gonna be like, I don't know if I can do that, I don't even like the sound of my voice, people, no one's gonna listen, everyone's gonna laugh at me, right? Well, that stuff that's gonna come up, it comes up for a reason, so that you can clear it out so that you can then take action because we go into super mode.
Carlie Maree 09:15
Super mode is all about action, right? She's like, your inner superhuman. She's like, I can move mountains. I'm gonna get it all done. So she's like, right, I'm gonna write a list. I'm gonna have a schedule. I'm gonna go and record eight episodes of my podcast in one sitting. Like she's got stamina, right? Like she will just get it done. She's the one who suddenly decides that you need to meal plan or you know, that you need to make lists of lists or you need to start using a diary or a planner or a bloody I don't know what, Asana or those different kind of, you know, software things that people use, that sort of stuff. Every time I hit super mode I decide I need one of those. Then I hit sparkle and go nah, no I don't, because after super mode comes sparkle mode.
Carlie Maree 09:55
So super mode is when I'm often - I homeschool my kids, right? So I'm quite often working around my kids and I'm working, working, working, and they're like Mum, come play with us and like, I just want to get this done. Just let me get it done. Let me get it done. And then they'll say, Mum, come on, come play with us. And I'll look up and I'll just be like, oh, and overwhelmed with parental guilt as we all get now and again. And I go, Shut the laptop, Carlie, and go play with your kids. And so I do. Sparkle mode comes in for a reason it comes in to remind us what really matters, brings us back to presence, brings us back to our body, brings us back to connection with the people that we love back to our values.
Carlie Maree 10:28
Sparkle mode is beautiful, but it's no time for getting any work done.Fantastic time for manifestation, for the law of attraction people, that are into energy and vibration. Oh, sparkle mode is glorious. We are in our vibrational genius. We are magnetic. You want to do some manifestation work? Do it in sparkle mode. You want to work on your relationship? Do it in sparkle mode. You want to fill your kids cup, you know, their little heart cup, fill it up in sparkle mode, because when Sparkle mode is done, wild mode's back.
Carlie Maree 10:57
So I cycle through all of these four in about a day. I cycle really fast. A lot of really high achieving women do, because they're very good at responding to their own energy and responding to what they need. So if you're someone who's very good at going, you know what, I'm just going to put the computer away, and I'm going to meditate because that's what my soul is asking me to do. Or you know what, I really feel called to write a list. So I'm going to do that, or I really feel called to, I don't know, start a podcast, or whatever it is. And if you're someone who's very good at doing what you feel internally called to do, rather than what the external world tells you you need to do - so those kind of badass women, they tend to cycle very fast through the modes, because they're giving themselves what they need, is four cups to fill, right?
Carlie Maree 11:41
We're four women, we've got four cups, you fill your wild cup, you'll shift to bear. You fill your bear cup, you'll shift to Super. Fill that cup, you'll shift to sparkle. And so it goes. So some people tend to spend a couple of days in each mode. And some people tend to spend only a few hours in each mode. So that's why it's tricky to kind of track because the only way you can track it is by paying a lot of attention to yourself, to -
Meaghan Smith 12:08
I gotta jump in here. I gotta jump in. Whoa, whoa, whoa. Okay, so, um, so there's the there's the four modes, and you say that we cycle through and - but I'm just curious, because I'm imagining someone thinking, oh, I'm a bear, or I'm, no, I'm just a wild woman all the time. So it's actually like a - it's not an actual type of person we are, it's like -
Carlie Maree 12:36
It's not like being a Scorpio. No.
Meaghan Smith 12:39
Yeah, right. So we're moving through this different stage of being, so to speak.
Carlie Maree 12:48
Yes, everybody's all of them. But my sparkly fairy will look different to your sparkly fairy, my wild woman will look different to yours. So my wild woman loves red lipstick and swearing. Your wild woman might love rock music and decluttering cupboards, right? If anyone who's ever chopped their hair off, you did it in wild mode, there's no doubt. And they've freaked out later, that was when bear hit right? So yes, everybody moves through all of them. But some people say to me, I don't have a sparkle mode. I've had a few people say to me, I don't have a sparkle mode, I don't have that time when I'm suddenly lovey dovey or feel like being around people or suddenly want to dance or curl my hair or something, right. And so I've, usually through a bit of conversation and a bit of getting them to pay attention, so when they know they've hit super, and just to get them to pay attention to when their energy shifts.
Carlie Maree 13:38
And I had one friend who said to me, and she'd had some childhood trauma, and I think, you know, affection was something she had some trauma around, expressing love and things like that. And so she realised that when she hits sparkle mode is when she feels gratitude. So she would suddenly just feel like God, I'm so grateful for my life, you know, just get moments like that, God, I'm so lucky. That's how she knows she's in sparkle mode. Or, and this is the same person, she doesn't like music. She's just not into music. I'm like, Oh my god, well, she's just not into music. And she said, in Sparkle mode, I can handle it. I can handle having music on. The other modes, I can't. So for me, my sparkle mode is like, Oh my god, I can't stop kissing my kids, like my sparkle mode is completely unleashed because I'm naturally very affectionate. But I'm also naturally very introverted. So it's when I'm more extroverted. So this is the thing if you know, you're someone who's really introverted, but you know, you want to make an effort to spend more time with friends, then try and organise it when you think you're going to be in a sparkle mode. See, this is the thing, everyone has access to all of these energies.
Meaghan Smith 14:45
Well, how do we know, how do we know when we're going to be in a mode?
Carlie Maree 14:49
Yeah, so if you can track your pattern, then you might be able to predict it. So if you know that you're tracking at about two days in each mode, for instance, and you're like, well, I'm in Super mode today, and I was in Super mode yesterday, which means tomorrow, I'm probably gonna hit sparkle, you might message a friend and go, Hey, do you want to catch up for coffee tomorrow. Because you're going to be in sparkle mode. And you might be like, actually, by the weekend, I'm going to be hitting wild, I'm going to clear my diary and I'm going to declutter that room that's been driving me crazy, because I'm really going to love doing it in wild mode, it's actually going to fill my cup.
Carlie Maree 15:24
So it's fantastic for energy management, because there are different things that need to be done, that are actually going to energise you in each of the modes. So admin, right? Not too many people love doing their admin, like their, I don't know, say you've got to do your tax or something. In Super mode, it's actually going to feel easier to do. And it's actually in a way, you know, when you get it done, you're like, oh, that actually wasn't that hard. That was so good, I actually feel really good now. Super mode hit, and you decided to do it.
Meaghan Smith 15:31
Carlie Maree 15:32
Rather than telling yourself stories, like, Oh, I should be with my kids now, you know, all the shoulds come in, and it stops us from doing what we actually are feeling called to do.
Meaghan Smith 15:59
So it sounds like it actually requires a level of self awareness, like being connected to yourself and where you're at. Yeah. Okay. So Carlie, let's shift gears a little bit, because this is a money mindset podcast. So let's move into the direction of how can we, how can women tap into this, the power of your soul modes, to create more money and get a good flow with money?
Carlie Maree 16:33
Yeah, yeah, absolutely. All right. So. Creating money is about, you would know, right? This is your work. A huge part of it is clearing out the I guess what you might call energetic blocks, the things that are kind of in the way, so bear mode is gold. Because it's when we can most easily access that stuff, it's when we can most easily figure out what is in the way, what is tripping us up or is holding us back, what is making us play small, for example. So say, if you're wanting to create a particular income in your business, then running your business around your mode. So I like to describe it that your wild woman should be your CEO. Because your wild woman is the one who is going to make big, bold moves that are going to make money, right? She's the one who's most connected to what you want to create, how you want to create it.
Carlie Maree 17:30
What is happening is many women, many people are allowing their superhuman, their super mode to actually run their business. So they're superhuman, what they do is they end up just having lots of systems, lots of processes, lots of checklists, lots of colour coded charts, but money's not coming in. So they're busy, busy, busy running their business, going, where's the money? Whereas your wild woman will look at it and go, get rid of all that. Make this move, write a book, launch a course, whatever it is. Write a post that blows everybody's minds and gets you 10 new clients, right? Like that kind of, those kind of moves. Let your wild woman run your business. When you hit wild mode, don't let her unleash, don't waste your wild mode on your house. So what's happening is a lot of people are hitting wild mode, getting really ragey, you know, getting mad at everyone for making a mess, and cleaning their house. And then in super mode they're like, Okay, I'm gonna get some work done.
Carlie Maree 18:25
So for me, it's generally actually the other way around. My wild woman works in my business, when I hit wild, I'm like, right, I need to write, I'm gonna write some posts. I'm gonna livestream. I'm gonna do big epic livestream and 10 people will buy my course. Right? And so I'll do a livestream and then in super mode, I tend to actually focus more on getting stuff done around my house, because I have a team now, I can do that. So when I'm in Super mode, I'm like, okay, to my OBM to my online business manager, I'm like, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. Here's all the things I need you to do, thank you, let me know how you go. And then I go focus on, whether it's organising my house or you know, whatever. So I think unleashing that, for me, and - like I built my business from 10k months to 100k months in less than, oh, I want to say, well, let's say 18 months, approximately, I'd have to go back and check that, something like that. And I did it through unapologetically doing what I felt called to do in the mode that I was in and letting my bear mode clear out all of the crap that was getting in the way of me doing the things that my soul was asking me to do. Like write books, like, you know, do big things.
Meaghan Smith 19:36
Oh, I love it. I love that so much. Like working, working with yourself to get done what you want to get done. But that really speaks to me, using wild mode to work on your business, because I think that that's something you just said then about getting all cray-cray with your family and just like, Tidy up everyone, this is what's happening, this is where - and then using that instead in your business, I think is a really good piece of wisdom there.
Carlie Maree 20:08
Yeah. This morning I was in, I was in Super mode this morning. So I homeschool my kids. We woke up and like, Okay guys, let's go, and because I was in Super mode, I was able to think really logically, really practically, I set up some great learning activities for them. I'm like, Come on, guys, let's go. So they fed off my energy. Now what I know in my super mode is I have to be careful not to be bossy, because I'm very impatient in Super mode. I'm like, let's just get this done. Come on, come on, come on, come on, and get a bit drill sergeant. So I'm like, everybody up at the bench, and we do our learning stuff. And we get it done because I've come up with these great ideas because I'm like thinking all super. And then at some point, I shifted into sparkle mode, I'm in sparkle mode now. And I shifted into sparkle mode. And I was like, well done guys. I'm so proud of you. This was amazing, you guys have nailed it this morning. All right, you know, what do you want to do now? And so then we just played games, just had a really, really nice time.
Carlie Maree 20:55
And then I know that pretty soon wild mode will hit. And it's fantastic. Because my babysitter arrives, I say goodbye to my kids in sparkle mode, come here, chat to you in sparkle mode. And then I'll spend my afternoon in wild mode working on my business. Creating, I've got a session to run in a course after this, I love doing trainings like that in wild mode because it just comes out like fire, it just pours out. It's like it's coming straight from, I don't know, something, somewhere else. You know, when you tap into your kind of, that genius energy where it just comes out. It's like, I am in the zone. It's a bit like that. But it can be a bit scary unleashing your wild woman. Because when you've been taught that you need to be proper and polished, and sit up straight and speak when you're spoken to and all that, if you've had an upbringing that's kind of like that. And you know, some of those messaging about you know, women who are unhinged and crazy and who does she think she is, and all that sort of stuff, then you might have a little bit of work to do to unleash your wild woman, there might be a bit of a journey, as my second book is about, is kind of unleashing that and letting that out of you so you can create the what's called sorcerer. So that doing life's like magic, because it's not easy for everyone to just, yeah, go wild, you know, say what you really think, make brave decisions.
Meaghan Smith 22:14
Yeah. Well, let's talk about that, then. Because how does our soul mode affect our ability to earn money? Like in terms of, is there a mode that we can't earn money in? Or? I mean, I don't even want to say that, because I just feel like, of course, we can earn money at any time.
Carlie Maree 22:32
All the time.
Meaghan Smith 22:34
But I've really, I mean, I'm not an expert in these modes, right? Like, I've read the book, and I'm letting it all sink in. And so my brain is like, Okay, so how does this affect our earning capabilities? I know you've talked about it a little bit already about doing CEO work in wild mode, but can we tap into all the modes to earn more? Yeah, let's talk about that.
Carlie Maree 23:02
Yeah. So we, I see kind of like my energy as a currency. So the more I'm kind of in flow with my energy and not kind of stifling myself, the more money is gonna come in, right, because people feel my energy, which goes for anyone who's watching, right, like, people feel your energy, they want to be connected to that they want to be part of that, like people who are here listening to your podcast, because they're connected to your energy, right, they're like, I love this chick. There's just something about the way she speaks, the things she talks about, love it, I'm here, right? It's like, they love your energy.
Carlie Maree 23:33
So the more we can kind of unleash that and be who we really are, people feel that authenticity, right, and more and more people are just getting more and more, you know, unwilling to tolerate inauthenticity from people. So the more you're working with your own energy, the more authentic you're going to come across. So I don't have a belief that I need to be doing something right now in order for money to be coming in. So I believe that I, you know, I have a business that's set up that, I create something, I put something out into the world and then it's out there earning me money. So say I did a live stream last night, well, that live stream's out there earning me money now, there could be people watching it now. Right. So the way that I kind of think about it is my job is to feel good, to work on my stuff that comes up as it comes up, to create what I feel called to create, to stay connected to what I desire. And so that looks different in each mode. So in wild mode, it's like oh, my God, what do I want to do, big picture. Yeah, I want to create this and do this, and oh my God, I want to make this and this. And then in bear mode, it's: Okay. Stop everything. Basically, for me, it is, I am not, I will not work in bear mode, unless there's something - if this was scheduled, and I was in bear mode, I would come and I would do it. I would probably speak a little bit slower, and it wouldn't be quite as dynamic. But I'll do it. I'm gonna do what I said I was gonna do, right? So in bear mode, generally, everything gets cancelled except things I can't cancel. But usually, for me bear mode hits at night or first thing in the morning. So generally that works okay. But bear mode, if it happens - like I'm known to take a nap in the middle of the day, if I've got a babysitter with my kids, and I've got a chunk that I was planning to work on my book that I'm in bear mode, well, I'm not going to work on my book, I'm going to take a nap. And some people might be like, well, how does your business survive? Well, because what happens is I get through my bear mode, then I hit super, I wake up, and I might be up till midnight typing, working on my book when I didn't plan to, because I don't tell myself stories that it's night time, you're not allowed to work, or it's Sunday, you're not allowed to work. It's like, No, but I'm in super mode, and I want to, then I'm going to.
Carlie Maree 25:39
And just because it's Tuesday at 10am doesn't mean I can't take a nap, if I'm bear mode, or meditate or take a bath or whatever I feel - go get a massage or whatever I feel like doing in that particular bear mode, I'm going to do it, which means my workday doesn't look traditional, doesn't look normal. But the good thing is that most of the time I'm doing what feels good for me to do. And when I'm doing that my channels for money to pour in are wide open, because I'm not miserable and blocked up and feeling fraughty and exhausted and over it and hating my business and no creative flow and no decent posts getting written. Right? So for me writing great posts is what makes money. So for me being in a creative, open flowing energy, then I write great posts, and people want to buy my stuff. So it's kind of figuring out what works for you. And how can you create space for that in a way that doesn't feel like hard work, doesn't feel stifling, doesn't necessarily have you getting up at 5am unless you want to. I refuse to get up early. That's not my thing. I'm happy to stay up late at night. So I think getting to know yourself and working with that is just, it's an incredible moneymaker. You know, because your energy is magnetic then.
Meaghan Smith 26:53
Yes, I love that. Oh, I mean, this is what I do in my business. But I mean, I haven't ever labelled it this way. But it's so interesting, because yeah, when we're fighting against ourselves, we don't produce our best work. And that's - the nap thing, actually, that's something that's more new to me in terms of really recognising, mate, I'm tired. Like I'll go to do something, but it's - I've had more experience of this now to trust that this really works, is that just like you're saying, if I feel tired, I do go and have a sleep. And it might only be for half an hour, or it might be for an hour. And then what happens is I've actually rested and integrated something like if something's been happening. And then lo and behold, this always happens, I get everything done. Whereas in the past, yeah, I used to really fight against myself, it's like no, got to get this done. It's got to happen. This is the deadline, this is what we've got to do. And then usually it either wouldn't all get done, or it would get done kind of half-arsed, a bit crappy. And just feeling spent, you know, like at the end of it, and I think this is where for the listener, if you can relate that this is where it's like working with yourself. This is my interpretation, like using these modes is getting to know yourself, but helping yourself to actually create what you want.
Carlie Maree 28:39
Yeah, yeah. So a lot of us have got a story that if you feel like doing nothing, and it's the middle of the day, then you must be lazy. And so I think replacing a word like lazy with bear mode, it just neutralises it. It's like, Oh, no, I'm just in bear mode. So it's like when you meet up with a friend and she's kind of quiet and she doesn't - she's not herself, you could be like, Oh, is something wrong? And she might be just like, No, I'm in bear mode. And you're like, Oh, sweet that's cool. Nothing's wrong, right? So it's like, in wild mode it might be like, Oh, god, I'm so irritated, like, What's wrong with me? And it's like - nothing, I'm in wild mode, I'm seeking freedom. If I'm surrounded by clutter, or I feel like I can't make the moves I want to make, then I'm going to feel stifled. So it's really cool that, you know, and there's a lot of stuff people talk about, like masculine feminine energy and all that. And it's almost like the message is we should be in our feminine.
Carlie Maree 29:29
But the thing is, in Super mode, we're in a masculine energy, and it's perfect. It's exactly how it's supposed to be. So it's kind of like it doesn't mean Oh, my God, I'm masculine, that's bad. Like, well, you know, there's all sorts of messaging that can get really confusing out there. And so it's just a beautiful way to accept where you're at, because all of the modes are brilliant. And when you look at what they're trying to give you, what they're trying to do for you, they're trying to get things done, or they're trying to move you forward, or they're trying to clear energy, or they're trying to, you know, whatever it is that that mode is trying to do for you. You can see it and you can be like, Oh, this is purposeful. So then we stop putting all these crappy labels on ourselves like lazy, or all of those things where it's not, you're not, there's nothing wrong with you. You're not one ordinary woman who is lazy and or masculine and, or blah, blah, blah. There's nothing that we have to make it mean bad. None of those things make me, Oh, I'm feeling lazy today. Sweet, good. We don't have to make that mean bad. We don't have to make it mean anything. We just get to love and appreciate and accept and embrace ourselves. And we're going to do such better work. Make so much more money, feel so much more energetic, the relationships will be better, our body will feel better. Like it just changes everything.
Meaghan Smith 30:45
Yeah, and not that we need permission to be a particular way. But that's what stood out to me about the four modes, that it's just a way of saying oh yeah, now is rest time, or now's go time. As opposed to making yourself - I mean, this is like a huge thing, Carlie, for my clients, and a huge, huge, huge work that I've integrated myself to get where I am, is this idea of making ourselves wrong. And I think bear mode speaks to me in this way that I can imagine that there's lots of people I mean, I've seen it in my clients who are like, Oh, yeah, but I just - whatever it is, that's coming up for them, and then feeling like they can't do, do, do, or get the list done, or that they're just feeling low energy, or something's happened, like actually happened, like a tangible thing that, you know, they feel down about or whatever.
Meaghan Smith 31:45
But for whatever reason, and I actually don't know the answer to this, because it's different for everyone. But we make that mean something's wrong with us, or that something has gone wrong. And I think - because the way that we're talking today, truth be told, it's sort of more 'wooo' than I usually am on the podcast - but that's not a problem. But I think what I liked about this book and the modes is that it's, you know, whatever language you want to use, who cares? Like call it whatever you want, sparkle mode, or being in gratitude. It's, that's just a label. But I wanted to expose my audience to this, because I think it's just another way that we can look at it. Like if these four modes, like if those words speak to you like, Ah, now I'm in bear mode, there's nothing wrong with me, it's fine. I can rest, I can recover. Like for me bear mode, I related to that as an integration time. And a recovery, like as if you know, you've done a workout and then you have recovery or something, but it's in our emotional state.
Carlie Maree 33:03
Absolutely. It's just as important as the workout. The rest, the repair is kind of Yeah, you need that peace, right?
Meaghan Smith 33:10
Yes, but I think this, Carlie, is such a missing link for people. It's like, we do, do, do, do, do, all the things. And then oh, you mean I have to sleep? Or we need to rest? Or, and sometimes I see this, that people get so busy that we're not connected to ourselves. We don't even know why we're doing something anymore. It's like we just get in the flow. Like this is how we always do it. This random example just came to my head, I just used to be like, Oh, the kids have got to be in bed by 7.30. Like, that's just - and it was so stressful. Oh, my goodness, this was like a few years ago, and my kids were a bit younger, and my partner and I would be beside ourselves. And both of us just dreaded bedtime. And then one day, it was like, Why? Why do they? Why do they have to be in bed by 7.30 actually? And then, so we just started letting them stay up late, and it was so easy to get them to bed. Like sometimes they would just take themselves to bed. And I mean, I'm just sort of using this as an example that we kind of get caught up in a way that we're supposed to be or that we're supposed to do things and when there's no awareness around it, or if we don't even look at why we're doing something. Yeah. Anyway, where did - I just went off on a tangent then But listen, let's bring it -
Carlie Maree 34:38
Yeah, I love it. I think the comparison piece is probably going to be helpful for your audience as well, right? Because often we're like, I just feel like I should be doing things because part of the thing is we're seeing everybody else doing things, right? So then we compare, we're like, oh god, I'd better do that, I'd better keep up, but the thing is, you're probably seeing somebody, say they've done a post or a video or something and, or they send out an email or whatever. They probably wrote that in Super mode. And if you're in bear mode, you're in a very different energy. If they're giving advice about how to do things, Get up and go, have a green smoothie and go for a run. Like, that's not for bears. That's not for you. They wrote that in Super, right.
Carlie Maree 35:16
So it really helps when you're seeing through your social media feed, or you're seeing the people around you what they're doing. Suddenly, comparison becomes not such a thing. I remember when I'd be at like school drop off in the morning, I would be in bear mode. So I would be in like, whatever I chucked in to get out the door, because getting out the door was hard, right? And I'd get there and there'd be a mom in active wear with her drink bottle and a cute little ponytail. And she's been up since five. And it would be really easy to compare and be like, why aren't I like that? Right? But I look at her, and I'm just like, you go you Super mode legend. I'm over here in bear. I'm gonna like appreciate you from a distance.
Carlie Maree 35:51
Like, or I'd see someone else who's in sparkle mode, and they're like working the room, and they're on fire, and everyone's loving them, and their energy is beautiful, and they're funny and all of that, and I'm just like, oh why aren't I like that? The thing is, I am when I'm in sparkle mode. I'm just not in sparkle mode right now, I'm in wild mode, and you're all irritating me. I've got no time for small talk right now. You know, like, it's this - comparison becomes much less of a thing and so does judgment. Because when we see all the other people in bear mode, and we're in Wild mode and we're like, why aren't you people all just getting out of your own way. As a coach, it can be a bit like when you're in wild mode, and you're talking to a client and they're in bear, you want to get a bit butt-kicky sometimes. So it's really helpful if you're in any kind of coaching profession, or teaching, to understand this.
Carlie Maree 36:39
Because if I'm in a client session, and I'm in Wild mode, and she's in bear, I know I've got to like, take a breath, slow down. Let her know that I see her, that I feel her, that I've got her rather than just being like, right, How are you going? Let's go! what's the big bold moves we're gonna make next? Because in bear mode, that's completely overwhelming and paralysing, that is not helping at all. In bear mode, she's got huge stuff coming up, probably, that if I can shift my energy, because that's my job, because I'm the coach, I've got to hold the space. So I've got to create the space that's going to be the most effective and healing and uplifting and whatever, space for her. It's suddenly judgment, as the other person's energy becomes much less of a thing, as does comparison. So it plays out in all sorts of directions.
Meaghan Smith 37:27
Ah, so interesting. I really, I love diving into these topics, because a lot of what you've talked about today is nothing new in the sense that I've never heard about, like being in a different mood or mode, right. But it's applying it, like having other language to grab onto and another way of looking at doing something. So I'm really grateful that you came on today because for me, I mean, I've never spoken about my, having a cycle of my life like this, and I just love being able to, yeah, grab on to new ways of like, looking at myself, learning about myself, having awareness from a different angle. So yeah, I'm glad that the listener today has access to that. But listen, we better wrap things up, because otherwise we're gonna be chatting all day. But I usually ask my guests if they have a practice or habit or a money tip that they do that they're happy to share. But I'm curious if you've got something that relates to the soul modes, something that's more maybe tangible.
Carlie Maree 38:39
Yeah, so, the question that I ask myself, which will often help me to know which mode I'm in, and I don't always know which mode I'm in, I can tell this morning I was in Super, so I knew sparkle was coming. But the question that I ask myself a lot, which is really helpful, is just like, what am I yearning for? Like, what is my soul asking me to do, would be another, would be a more 'wooo' way to ask that question. But what am I yearning for in each moment? Because it's just we spend a lot of time going, what should I do next? And I just really want to see everyone do away with the word 'should', to be honest, and replace it with that kind of 'What am I yearning for?'
Carlie Maree 39:12
Because it just takes us from an external guidance, an external direction, to an internal one. And it's gonna help us to work. This is the thing. Once you kind of know the modes are a thing, and you're like, Oh, that's right. I get to, I'm guided, blah, blah, blah, whatever, however you want to think of it, then you always can kind of just forget about it, right? Because it's like, oh, well, as long as I do what I feel guided to do in each moment, I'll only end up in great places. I'll only end up creating, you know, incredible things. When we first went into lockdown last year, I was like, unapologetically working with my modes because the cool thing was, we were in lockdown. We had nowhere to be, nothing to do. We didn't do the remote learning, we did our own thing. And so we could just kind of cruise with the day, which meant I could work with my own energy and what ended up happening but doubled my income during lockdown. And, just, life just got better in so many ways. And it was really cool to see what happened when I unapologetically did what felt good for me to do with my business, grew my following - I wrote a book - I wrote Book Two, in three months while in lockdown. They're the two big things that happened in my business.
Carlie Maree 40:24
I decided not to send my daughter back to school because she was learning so beautifully at home, she didn't want to go back to school. So we've been homeschooling ever since. And it all happened because I had this beautiful gift of this space and for a lot of people lockdown is not a gift. Early lockdown was a gift for me in that way because all responsibility to be anywhere and do anything was gone. And I could wake up beary, if I wanted to, and bear out for the morning and stay in bed and read a book. Or I could get up early and go for a run, if that's what I wanted to do. There was no - all bets were off. So I would love - I realised, you know, some people are in lockdown, some people aren't, some people have got different things going on. But if you can bring a little bit of that in whatever way that you can into life, which is to do what feels good for you to do. It feels like it's gonna tear everything down, and we won't make any money anymore. For me, it was the exact opposite of that. My business flew up.
Meaghan Smith 41:22
Yes. Oh, yes. And if you heard anything today, just take that on because like, this is something that, some of my clients sometimes are like, Eh? Where are we going with this? Like when I'm all about, self love, self appreciation, because what that says to me is that you were loving yourself hard through that time, like you were really in tune with who you were, what you needed, your soul mode. And what happens when we're in this space and Carlie, I mean, I've just completed my first year of business. So this still blows my mind. I'm not like fully in the absolute certainty. Like, I still have doubt when this happens. But every time I just trust myself, go 100% in on myself, like just love myself sick through everything. Like anything that I do that I thought was going to go a particular way but didn't work out or something like that. It always works out. I mean, exactly the same thing. I created a business in this pandemic, and then did the same thing, like doubled my income, and like, it's just crazy, crazy pants stuff that when I, you know, I think back to a few years ago, before I did coaching or any of this stuff, I couldn't have - I didn't understand. I was like, What are they talking? You know, what's - I don't understand that. But yeah, it's like, love yourself. Love yourself all the way to what you want. That's kind of not talked about enough. I really, I think that's like the whole, people are like - Love yourself? What does that mean?
Carlie Maree 43:12
Well, love is a verb, right? It means like not just going Oh, I love myself, but like giving love to yourself. Giving, just like loving your children isn't just Oh, I love you. It's, Here, I made you a beautiful meal. Here, let's play. Here - It's a verb, right? So giving love to yourself, I think some people get lost in the, Oh, self love, yeah, yeah. Like, no, it's a really powerful dynamic thing to do. It's a 'doing' activity.
Meaghan Smith 43:37
Yes. And once you learn how to do that, you can love yourself through it all. Like you can love yourself in bear mode. You can love yourself in sparkle mode. You can love yourself in wild mode. Have I missed one? You can love yourself in Super mode. Yeah, yeah. And I feel like for me, it's like all the pieces of the puzzle clicking together when you're really operating from that place of self love, which is what I interpret your whole soul modes to be.
Carlie Maree 44:10
I love that. Thank you.
Meaghan Smith 44:12
All right, Let's let everybody know where they can find you. How do they, where do they get your book? Where do they connect with you? Where are you? Tell us all the things and I'll make sure I put it in the show notes as well for you listening.
Carlie Maree 44:26
Thank you. Yeah, look, I'm all over the place. You can find me at carliemaree.com where if you are in Australia, you can order the book straight from me and I will send it out or if you are anywhere else, grab it on Amazon. You can get it on Amazon in Australia as well if you like ordering there. So Amazon or carliemaree.com , you'll find the book there. And I'm on Facebook and Instagram. If you search Carlie Maree, you'll find me. You'll see the spelling, I'm sure, in the name of the podcast episode. You'll find me on Facebook and Instagram. I do have a podcast where I have a bunch of episodes where I dive a little bit more into the modes. It's called Genius Unleashed. But the thing a lot of people might want to go and do is watch the doco, I made a doco about it. And it's called the Soul Modes Movie. And if you search the Soul Modes Movie on YouTube, or Instagram or Facebook, you should find it. And it's about 55 minutes and I interview a bunch of women about it. That's really cool.
Meaghan Smith 45:19
Oh, cool. I didn't know about that. Okay. All right. Well, I'm sure we can do that. Yeah, we can put all that magic stuff. Thank you so much for joining me today. I love talking about all the things and this is definitely a different angle that I have not brought to the show before. So so so fun. Thank you for being here.
Carlie Maree 45:40
Thank you. See you soon.
Meaghan Smith 45:44
Oh, gosh, okay, so, Soul Modes, alright, such an interesting concept. And what I love about it is that it speaks to living your life in a way that's for you, not against you. I think I said that earlier on in the podcast, so be sure to go to the show notes. If you want to find out more about Carlie and her book Soul Modes, that'll be moneymindful.com.au forward slash podcast95.
Meaghan Smith 46:12
Money is such a triggering area. I love helping women uncover and unblock their limiting beliefs around money and success. I think to have money and success and a life that you love, and love yourself in it, requires a positive relationship with money, success and yourself. If you want a life that is designed by you, for you, a life doing what you love, making the money that you want, and loving yourself all the way through it, I can help you with that. You can find out more by booking a consultation on my website, the consultation is a fun chat where I help you identify what's getting in the way and a plan to get you what you want. Alright. Lovely. Until next time, have a beautiful week. Bye Bye.